I Guess This is Goodbye

I vividly remember how my first school experience felt (which is very strange, considering that I was about 3 years old). I remember not wanting to go to kinder garden. I didn’t want to leave the house, the comfort, my parents. I guess the only thing that got me to go was my brother (that’s what I´ve been told). Having my twin there with me apparently made me more confident. When we got there I didn´t want to let go of my dad´s hand, I couldn´t. But as soon as this kid came up to me and asked if I wanted to play with him, I felt immediately at home. My parents left and time flew by quickly, once I realized it was already time to leave, I was devastated. I didn´t want to go home. I wanted to stay there, having fun and nap time.

A few years went by and on the last year of kinder garden I met this amazing girl, Bárbara. I remember starring at her blond hair falling as she went from the bottom of the “escadinha” right to the top, in less than 10 seconds (that´s what it seemed). We became friends instantly. We used to always go to each other´s houses, draw and watch TV all afternoon.

I remember feeling so grown up when we got into 1^st grade (Bárbara and I went to the same school). I met some really amazing people, who ended up being my classmates until 7^th grade: Duda, Klaus, Taikan and Gabriel.

On 3^rd grade, this new girl became our classmate. Her name is Serena. She was always happy and friendly (no wonder we´re still friends). Me, Bárbara, Duda and Serena became best friends. On 4^th grade there was another “new girl”, Bella, she had just moved from Botucatu (SP). I can´t properly explain how it felt to meet her, but I felt like I had known her my entire life. I don´t think I´ve ever had a better (best) friend than her. We used to be in so much synchrony with each other, people thought we were sisters, and we really were.

 A few years later I met my (male) best friend, William. Again, I don´t think I´ve ever been more close to somebody, than him. We had similar taste for everything, from music to hobbies. He was sort of my soulmate for a while.

My life was stable for a while, but then everything changed. Bella moved to Florianópolis and our class split up. I changed schools along with some of my best friends: Bárbara, Serena, Duda and Kaka. We started attending João XXIII, it was one of the most important and significant things I´d ever done. I barely knew my life was about to change forever.

At first I was so nervous about having new classmates, difficult tests, exams (trimestrais), and thought it was very strange to change classrooms from class to class. But then I got used to everything, and became friends with an amazing girl: Lauren. She was the first person who came to talk to us, she made us feel comfortable and at home at the new school. We´ve been best friends since then. 

That same year the school proposed a trip to London, to learn English. I went, along with Laura, Luísa, Renata, Luiza and some other girls. After the trip, I became good friends with Laura and the other girls, but only by the end of the year we were really close.

My 1^st High School year was one of the bests. The whole class became really close and we started going out together, to parties, to the mall and even to the movies. I have many good memories from that year. It definitely “left a mark”.

I received a gift on my 2^nd High School year, Rafaela. (Unfortunately, but fortunately) she had to take that grade again, and we ended up becoming friends, best friends (me + the whole party). She was, for sure, the most important thing that happened that year. Always painfully honest (in a good way) and opened minded, she conquered my heart. In the same year, I got invited to be a part of the student council, 2^nd best thing I´ve ever done. It was so much fun planning everything for the “Gincana GEJ” and being responsible for translating the thoughts of students.

But I believe the most important decision (and best thing) I´ve ever done, was going to Canada as an exchange student, for 6 months. I loved everything about my time there, the people, my hosts, everyone I got to meet, the safety, the quiet, the food, the snow, springtime, summertime, and, most importantly, I loved that I got to go with Luísa. My time there allowed me to grow as a person, become more independent, more responsible, and be happier. Canada was a BIG part of my High School experience, even though time was short. 

 

Coming back to Brazil was harder than I thought. I had to leave my life there (in Canada) behind, put it on pause, and that wasn´t easy to do. Of course, seeing my friends again was gratifying, I missed them so much, I even missed getting mad at them. But this feeling that something had come to an end left a whole in my stomach. And the feeling won´t go away, especially now that we´re on our last High School year.

Every time I think about it I get nostalgic, I can´t believe it´s ending. This knot forms in my throat, and I can nor breathe or cry. I´m not quite sure what it is, but it doesn´t feel good. I´m going to miss everyone so, so much. School has been an amazing journey, one that I´ll always carry in my heart. I can´t say friends are for life, but our connection sure is. I love you guys, and I´ll miss you. I can´t imagine how my life could´ve been without you. We´ll keep in touch. <3

Júlia Chaves